This entry comes with a mixture of many things: apologies, gratitude, awe, admiration, & TLC

I had written an entry a couple of months ago but it didn’t post, maybe it was a sign to wait for the right time

Now seems perfect timing so allow me the opportunity to pour my heart, soul & mind out

This is a tribute to the people that I have gotten to know in the past 10 years (at different points within those years)

But whom I have had an opportunity to really see, hear, understand & have come to love and who have made an

incredible impact in my life.

Last year, I had a roller coaster of emotions which I allowed to get the better of me.  The gist of it being that I had lost myself & thinking & feeling that I had lost my friends as well. I felt that I could not communicate to them, that they were in their bubble & I was outside looking in. I behaved terribly around them & like a brat throwing “shit fits” as WAP put it knowing no other way of dealing with it & having no control over my emotions. He & the rest of them were right. But I didn’t know what to do or how to better everything. Today however I have come full circle (or I hope I have at least).

I have finally come to terms with the fact that we knew each other at a very susceptible time in our lives (our teenage years). We were the same people, with the same feelings & emotions, trying to find ourselves & determine what we wanted to do in the future. However, being in our twenties now, and after going through so many events since then, we have molded into our own. We are the same people working towards different goals at different times. We are studying or holding jobs, we have different priorities now too. We do different things at different times & it doesn’t mean that we care less for anybody. We may not be around at certain events or times when others are only because we are all on different schedules. It doesn’t make us lesser of a friend, it just means that we need to communicate with our friends at different times.

CFB:                        You are an incredible person with a huge heart who has taught me that it is ok to love. To not be afraid of giving too much & you were there for me when I finally decided to give my heart but it was broken & returned to me. You always made me feel more than I felt & for that I owe you so much. I haven’t always been able to be around for you at times but I try even if it’s for awhile. But you need to know that I am so grateful that you have found an amazing person to be there for you every step of the way. That you are being taken care off is all that I need to know when I am not able to take care of you J I love you babe

SHARKY:                You are an amazing person who has shown me that there is no end to giving. Because that’s what you do continuously without wanting anything in returned & rejecting it when it is given to you J the room always lights up when you walk in due to your infectious nature, smiles & laughter. You’re always putting people at ease. I have always wished I could be more like you but I’m not so being around you is the ultimate pleasure J You have taken care of my friends when I was not around so for that I am utterly grateful & so blessed that you found your way to our group & making it that much better. I love you babe

WAP:                       Man oh man oh man J thanks for bringing to light my “shit fits” coz I could do something about it. We may not speak or see each other alot but is often on my mind. Says things which sometimes you wish he didn’t but after awhile it just goes over your head. You have found what you’re looking for & I am so happy for you because of it (just don’t forget us k J) You are not afraid to be who you are & going for the things that you want even though you know that you won’t necessarily get the reactions you want. I admire that quality & wish that I could be more like that. Love ya darl ;)

OGB:                       Your plight right now I share with you a little. You don’t give yourself enough credit. Don’t allow yourself to be held down because of others. You may go through rough times but they will make you stronger. If you need time away to figure out stuff then that’s what you need but you really don’t need to move away from your friends (take it from me) coz you will find that in many unspoken ways, they will help you figure out what is going on. Sometimes what you want, no matter how hard you try it just won’t happen, keep that in mind for later & try something for now & it will work itself out as someone once told all of us J Love ya babe

JB:                           She epitomizes the strength of a woman. She is a go getter. She lives for today and she isn’t afraid of speaking her mind and saying what is right. Initially a bit taken aback by that, I have grown accustomed to it & I respect her so much because of it. She is beautiful & has found what she has searched for & I am so thrilled that I designated myself as her “emergency person” on her special day & she agreed J hahahaha Thank you for being you & being a friend more then you needed to be J love ya babe

LMM:                       My almost next door neighbour. You have been through your fair share of shit & you have no idea how many times you have picked yourself up (it pays to listen to sharky rite J) hahahahaha My companion sometimes I hope when CFB, SHARKY & JB go to The Big AppleJ  Love ya babe

IP:                            Hahahahaha cracks me up whenever I hear about her or hear her talk J *warning* her laughter is infectious J Never really communicated much before till some time ago. It’s amazing what she puts herself through & takes. I’m sure you will find what you’re looking for eventually. JLove ya babe

There you have it. My friends, my pillars of strength, my guardians, my wackos. Thank you for being you & allowing me to be me. No matter what has happened, or what may happen in the future, you guys will always have a place in my heart. No matter time, place or distance.

This is my tribute to all of you